There were three fish hooks in my entrée! I don't think I've ever been this unsatisfied in all my life. New restaurant options are available in the store for just a few days! I've heard better interviews from guys with a history of concussions.Įnough! I'm going back to what I do best: level-headed sports analysis.Īnger didn’t seem impressed by his dining experiences. Seriously? That interview was a joke! But not the type that’s funny or even makes you think. Well spoken! Thank you Mayor for your time and public service. I say to those voters “I hope when you regain consciousness you remember whatever happened was all your fault. What you won't be sharing is my hair and makeup team.Ī lot of voters have approached my limousine to tell my bodyguards they want Springfield to be a safer place to live. You’ll now be sharing the politics beat with me. Got your fill of being a food critic, Anger?įill? Is that a joke? Because all I got was a tapeworm and two types of hepatitis. I’ll take it! I may even use that quote in the ads we run during coverage of death row executions! The only positive I can say is the bathroom was cleaner than the kitchen. Something like sending my mouth to prison. I came into this expecting the worst dining experience possible. I yearn to insult fat, sweaty, living things again! 4 Start CharacterĬriticizing food has lost its luster. They served my meal, delicious as it was, on a silver platter!? Silver!Įverybody knows silver is second place, and Anger Watkins does not finish second! You see me, you bust out the platinum! I gave myself to this non-driving, non-truck food truck and in return I received disappointment and an after-dinner mint! I give it one star.Īnd that one star was me. The one time this bloated, mistaken rock named Earth acts like it’s supposed to!Īlright, time for the bottom line on the Gilded Truffle. I order, I eat, someone else pays, I complain into a camera, and someone pays me. 3 Start Characterįinally, an assignment appropriate for my broadcasting skills. Why are these wrinkled layabouts hoarding the cats that hard-working people should be holding and scratching behind the neck?Ī poor allocation of our cat resources and an absolute joke! More on this breaking story tonight at six. With their whiskers and sullen dispositions. A complete waste of grass, trees, and fresh air! That’s right, I root for concrete!Īnger Watkins here at Springfield's Retirement Castle, where a local group brought cats to play with the seniors. Maybe I’ll start with this story about a new park opening. I’ve just been brought in to jack the ratings with my repertoire of fuming and venting. Your greedy ambition reminds me of a certain championship quarterback. Was he fired? If so, I get his parking spot and coffee mug – it’s in my contract! Expect a total and complete sapping of your once-thriving spirit. What can we expect tomorrow Anger?Įxpect disappointment, sorrow, and dark moods full of rolling fury. …and the Pope admitted he was flashing gang signs in the photo.Īnd now, over to our new weatherman, Anger Watkins. I decided this after great thought, while waiting for the restaurant valet to bring my car around. Watching sports on TV, yelling at the TV, then coming to work and yelling on TV about what I saw on TV.Īnd now you want me to cover things other than sports? This whole thing is making Anger angry!Īnger drives ratings. Make Brockman Provide Political Commentaryĭialogue Sportscasted Pt. Make Anger Watkins Provide Political Commentary Make Anger Watkins Choke Down a Double Krusty Burger
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